Allergy Season

That pretty much sums up my life. I mean, what season isn't allergy season? Winter is generally pretty good, allergy wise, but the cold makes life difficult.
I think my body just hates me. Since February I've had increasing allergies. Basically, since it began to warm up here. I get this every spring, but it has been particularly noticeable this one, perhaps because I am actually beginning to feel a little better overall. Now when I get knocked on my back, it seems worse because I am able to spend more time up. My body just can't tolerate the extra load of allergies and it affects me across the board--making my chemical sensitivities worse and any pain I have or attacking other weak areas.
I was figuring that out the other day though and I realized that I still have incredibly few hours in my active/profitable day. I think I'm averaging around seven hours out of bed right now. It's been low the last few weeks, I should be getting at least 10 and 12 on a day when I push myself. The couch is my best friend. And my worst enemy.
On the other hand, last week, after I mentioned that I wasn't feeling great and asked ya'll to pray for me, I did feel an upsurge a couple of days later. So, I thought I'd put out a second appeal. Your prayers really do make a difference in my life and in my work. They are needed so that I can do what God asks of me.

The good thing about being sick is that it does help you to focus priorities a bit. I mean, if you only have a few hours up, you want to use that time the best you can. It doesn't mean I always do, but I try. Plus, it keeps my focus on eternity and remembering that this life is "but 70 years" and so I am almost half way through the race! It is one heck of an endurance run! :)
I've also been thinking a lot about how far I have come healthwise. I mean, ya, I still struggle a lot, but compared to a few years ago...! Wow. Vast improvements! Being out of bed for four hours a day used to be remarkable, incredible, a really good day. Now that is a really bad day and mostly I have twice that much energy. I'm also free from the pain from herniating the disk in my back. I am no longer in constant pain. I still have pain from other areas of my body, but rarely from that. It is amazing to think back and realize the work of healing that God did there! I'm so grateful.

Do I get down from being sick so much? Yes. I've been feeling down about it all this week. Frustrated with myself. Wanting to rise above, move on with my life. I want to do all the work that normal people are able to do. Instead, I'm stuck here. Chained to my couch. It makes me feel worthless and like I don't deserve the support I receive. But, I'm not in charge of that; God is. And in the end, He is the one working in and through me to achieve His perfect will. And that's when I realize that I am privileged because of my struggles I get to see God "up close and personal" providing me the energy and focus to do what He wants me to do today, providing for my physical needs, providing for the strength and grace and patience for each day.