I am a child. Perhaps three or four years old. I am frightened. I'm looking for comfort. There is a light down the hall. I can see it under the door. Just a crack of light, but it looks warm and inviting compared to the darkness around me. I can't reach the handle, as a matter of fact the door goes so high that I can't see the top of it. But I push on the door and it noiselessly gives way to my touch.
Timidly, I peek around the door. The light is so bright, but somehow soft and welcoming too. The room beyond is huge. HUGE. I can't see the other side of it, or any of the other walls for that matter. Or the ceiling. Yet, I know that I am not outside. As my wondering gaze wanders around the room I discover that the light seems to come from the center of it. In the center is a man sitting on a chair. He looks like a nice man. Everything seems to center around him. I don't understand it. There are people with wings--angels?--going to and from him all the time and around him there are these creatures who keep saying, "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come." And every time they say that all these men who are sitting around the man in the center hop off their chairs and bow down to the ground and say, "You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being." I guess the man in the middle is God?
There is a path from the door to his throne. As I continue to take in all that is around me, I begin to meander up the path. Somehow, I know that I want to go to him. I know that he will comfort me. He looks strong and, well, a little frightening. There is something about him that makes me cautious and yet I see that his eyes are so kind and I can't help but move towards him.
I move forward, this little child, in awe and wonder of my surroundings, unaware of the stir I am causing. At first, no one noticed the child opening the door and peaking in. Well, no one except him. He couldn't seem to drag his eyes away from this innocent child who was exploring his throne room. As he watched a tiny smile played across his face. Some of the fierceness left it and the underlying gentleness and kindness became more visible. An angel came with a message from Gabriel, his eyes never left the little child as he answered. The angel went away bemused and wondering why God didn't have that child removed from the Throne Room. After all, this was an important place and a child had no business here!
Others around the room were beginning to notice the child. A guard moved forward to bar the path, but God signed him away. The child meandered closer, eyes wide, mouth agape; the original fright was forgotten, in its place was wonder and awe at this remarkable place and the strange creatures that were about. A hush had fallen over the room as more and more noticed the child and turned to God to see his response. Shocked faces saw that he was enjoying! this spectacle! Whispers ran around heaven, everyone was wondering who this child was that God could not take his eyes off of.
Indeed, as God watched his face became gentler and softer. He was leaning forward on his throne a bit now. The child was close and he was eagerly awaiting it. There was expectation and excitement on his face. Joy. And love. So much love. The inhabitants of heaven had never seen anything like it. God's face was utterly shining with love for this little child who was disrupting the rhythm and harmony of heaven. Everyone did their best to continue on with their duties watching God and the child out of the corner of their eyes to see what would happen.
Suddenly the child stumbled, but before anyone could react God was off his throne and catching the child in his arms. A collective gasp was heard. No one had ever seen God on his knees before! And here this troublesome child had completely disrupted the order and dignity of Heaven. Surely God was going to send it away. But look! Small arms wrap around his neck. A little head is buried in his shoulder and he gets up and returns to his throne with the child in his arms. As though it was nothing unusual. Except that he can't drag his eyes away from that little person clinging so desperately to him. A small, frightened face peeks up at him. He smiles, leans down and kisses that forehead oh-so-tenderly. He wipes away the tear that was forming in the little eye. A smile glimmers on the child's face and little hands tighten around God's neck, pulling him closer. A little mouth is put near his ear and a secret is exchanged. God chuckles and his arms tighten around this little one. Love radiates out of him. He is beaming and the sound of joy is heard throughout heaven. The angels are in awe. The creatures cover their eyes in awe of the love on God's face and the elders worship as they watch their master rejoice with a joy like they have never seen before. Heaven resumes its rhythm as a little child snuggles in God's lap, telling him secrets, sharing joys and sorrows and eventually falling asleep in the safest place in the world. And God. Almighty. Jehovah. I AM. God buries his face in a child's hair. And he is happy.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Something to Think About
http://hart.ca/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=95&Itemid=144
I have friends who feel that Ukraine is safer than any other country they've lived in. I have to say that that has not been my experience.
I have friends who want to go out of country for work. It always makes me so worried.
I have friends who feel that Ukraine is safer than any other country they've lived in. I have to say that that has not been my experience.
I have friends who want to go out of country for work. It always makes me so worried.
Friday, September 18, 2009
For Prayer
We're having some financial issues here at the office. Actually, most of it is just bookkeeping issues, but somewhere in someone else's bookkeeping they seem to have lost a very large sum (like, enough to buy a new car) that we paid them in the past and are trying to say that we didn't pay them that. That is situation one.
Situation two is that last December another chunk went missing from our office. The last person to handle the money that we have record of is me. I'm fairly certain I didn't steal it, but maybe I'm schizophrenic. We're still looking for that sum in the records as well.
And situation three that has totally agitated our bookkeeper is that someone from the electric company came today and is threatening to turn off our electricity for reasons that I won't bother explaining here, except that they would of course like money that we don't owe. However, that is the smaller issue. The other issue is that they think we have a business here and the prices for electricty and the taxes involved with that are quite different to what we (or rather our landlord) pay now. We, of course don't have a business here, but we do work here. Difficult situation. Much more complex than it seems in writing. Life here is never simple. Black and white doesn't really exist, it is all a bunch of gray.
Please do pray for us in these situations and that God would just pour His oil on our troubled waters. It would all come down on a Friday...
Situation two is that last December another chunk went missing from our office. The last person to handle the money that we have record of is me. I'm fairly certain I didn't steal it, but maybe I'm schizophrenic. We're still looking for that sum in the records as well.
And situation three that has totally agitated our bookkeeper is that someone from the electric company came today and is threatening to turn off our electricity for reasons that I won't bother explaining here, except that they would of course like money that we don't owe. However, that is the smaller issue. The other issue is that they think we have a business here and the prices for electricty and the taxes involved with that are quite different to what we (or rather our landlord) pay now. We, of course don't have a business here, but we do work here. Difficult situation. Much more complex than it seems in writing. Life here is never simple. Black and white doesn't really exist, it is all a bunch of gray.
Please do pray for us in these situations and that God would just pour His oil on our troubled waters. It would all come down on a Friday...
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Opportunities
As ever, there seem to be new opportunities coming my way. Some of them I am more excited about than others. Some I'm still working on not feeling guilty about saying "no" to. Others are good and I have to say "no" simply not to overburden myself.
Last week I said "yes" to an opportunity for ministry and I am glad that I did!
A friend asked me to come and take some pictures of a soup kitchen type ministry that our church is involved with. The pictures are for the church's website (I'm supposed to write an article for it too, but we are still working on that :) ). So, I went downtown on Wednesday just after noon and found my way through the market, past the fire station and down an alley behind a government building to the shack where people had already started to expectantly gather. The location is ideal, it is in between the two main streets downtown. The actual shack isn't so ideal. Half of it is given to a recycling business, you know, where you can bring old bottles and cardboard and get a few pennies for them. On the other side of the shack is where we met. Since a lot of homeless people do collect bottles and what not for return the location is good in that it is easy for them to find. But the shack is pretty dismal. Really it is just a storage shed, where they store the various pieces of wood, ancient chairs and buckets that they use to construct seating for the Wednesday and Saturday gatherings. They have to put it away each time or someone would steal it.
Everyone sits outside on the makeshift seating. Recently, they were able to construct a roof over part of the oustide area so now people have a little protection from the elements while they eat. The food itself is prepared in the church office by volunteers and then brought over in a van. On Wednesday, while I was there, they served green borscht (a hearty soup and very traditional Ukrainian); a main course consisting of cheap pasta, a gravy that occasionally had pieces of meat in it and a cabbage-based salad; there is no dessert, but they did serve compote (think, natural koolaid) after the meal.
Twenty-four people gathered for food, but the volunteers said that they have up to forty, esp. in winter. The mix of people who came was amazing. Some were obviously homeless and either alcoholics or addicted to drugs. But there were several older people who may or may not be homeless, all of them were very hungry. Chances are that even for those who aren't homeless they aren't getting enough from their pension to feed themselves adequately and they must not have family to care for them. There were also a couple of others who have just fallen on hard times through one cause or another. It became apparent to me that one lady was there primarily because she needed a listening ear. Another girl was there because she needs the love and acceptance. Each one had their own needs, some visible and some not.
Overall the group was very well behaved and lined up quietly after we prayed for the food. There was a little anxiety among some that they wouldn't get their portion, but most of the group were very good natured and patient. It was hardest to watch some of the older ladies who were so obviously starving. As soon as they got their bowl of soup they began eating it as quickly as they good.
After the meal is served and everyone is satisfied, the leftovers are handed out (on or two brought bottles or jars to take food with them) and then everyone is invited to stay and listen to a Bible talk. There is no pressure, but over half the group stayed and most listened intently as my friend read from Matthew and challenged them to love other people and to love God. The gospel message was very clearly presented and everyone was challenged to make a personal commitment.
This ministry continues on Saturday evenings as well. Tea is served with a bun, but not hot meal. However, hair cuts are offered and shaves. And then there is again a time for Bible reading and discussion. Saturday is much more focused on the spiritual side of things and it is organized more like a Bible study. Less people come, but those who come participate for the most part and are interested and have questions.
It was interesting to visit this ministry. I was a little intimidated at first, but everyone was friendly to me and I actually enjoyed getting to meet some of these people an also seeing people that I see at church every Sunday serving others. It has certainly given me food for prayer. I hope I'll be able to go back and visit in the future.
Last week I said "yes" to an opportunity for ministry and I am glad that I did!
A friend asked me to come and take some pictures of a soup kitchen type ministry that our church is involved with. The pictures are for the church's website (I'm supposed to write an article for it too, but we are still working on that :) ). So, I went downtown on Wednesday just after noon and found my way through the market, past the fire station and down an alley behind a government building to the shack where people had already started to expectantly gather. The location is ideal, it is in between the two main streets downtown. The actual shack isn't so ideal. Half of it is given to a recycling business, you know, where you can bring old bottles and cardboard and get a few pennies for them. On the other side of the shack is where we met. Since a lot of homeless people do collect bottles and what not for return the location is good in that it is easy for them to find. But the shack is pretty dismal. Really it is just a storage shed, where they store the various pieces of wood, ancient chairs and buckets that they use to construct seating for the Wednesday and Saturday gatherings. They have to put it away each time or someone would steal it.
Everyone sits outside on the makeshift seating. Recently, they were able to construct a roof over part of the oustide area so now people have a little protection from the elements while they eat. The food itself is prepared in the church office by volunteers and then brought over in a van. On Wednesday, while I was there, they served green borscht (a hearty soup and very traditional Ukrainian); a main course consisting of cheap pasta, a gravy that occasionally had pieces of meat in it and a cabbage-based salad; there is no dessert, but they did serve compote (think, natural koolaid) after the meal.
Twenty-four people gathered for food, but the volunteers said that they have up to forty, esp. in winter. The mix of people who came was amazing. Some were obviously homeless and either alcoholics or addicted to drugs. But there were several older people who may or may not be homeless, all of them were very hungry. Chances are that even for those who aren't homeless they aren't getting enough from their pension to feed themselves adequately and they must not have family to care for them. There were also a couple of others who have just fallen on hard times through one cause or another. It became apparent to me that one lady was there primarily because she needed a listening ear. Another girl was there because she needs the love and acceptance. Each one had their own needs, some visible and some not.
Overall the group was very well behaved and lined up quietly after we prayed for the food. There was a little anxiety among some that they wouldn't get their portion, but most of the group were very good natured and patient. It was hardest to watch some of the older ladies who were so obviously starving. As soon as they got their bowl of soup they began eating it as quickly as they good.
After the meal is served and everyone is satisfied, the leftovers are handed out (on or two brought bottles or jars to take food with them) and then everyone is invited to stay and listen to a Bible talk. There is no pressure, but over half the group stayed and most listened intently as my friend read from Matthew and challenged them to love other people and to love God. The gospel message was very clearly presented and everyone was challenged to make a personal commitment.
This ministry continues on Saturday evenings as well. Tea is served with a bun, but not hot meal. However, hair cuts are offered and shaves. And then there is again a time for Bible reading and discussion. Saturday is much more focused on the spiritual side of things and it is organized more like a Bible study. Less people come, but those who come participate for the most part and are interested and have questions.
It was interesting to visit this ministry. I was a little intimidated at first, but everyone was friendly to me and I actually enjoyed getting to meet some of these people an also seeing people that I see at church every Sunday serving others. It has certainly given me food for prayer. I hope I'll be able to go back and visit in the future.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
The Visa Story
I promised that I would explain what all happened with my visa in Turkey, so here goes:
Getting my visa renewal sorted out started out quite complex and then ended up being really simple. The biggest problem, I think, was that I am an American and they don't often (ever?) have Americans going through Turkey for visa renewals, esp. now that Americans can be in Ukraine for 90 days without a visa at all.
I spent a lot of time on the phone explaining that I live in Ukraine and actually do need a visa because I need to be here for more than 90 days at a time. Then we had issues about where I could renew my visa. There is a Ukrainian consulate in Antalya (where I was vacationing), but they don't do visas there. What they didn't tell me is that they can send the documents to Ankara (the capital of Turkey) and get the visa done at the embassy there. I spent a lot of time talking to the head guy at the Ukrainian embassy in Ankara before we figured out that I did not have to appear in person (enough time that he recognized my voice the next day on the phone), but could send my documents through the consulate in Antalya. It was a relief not to have to go to Ankara as I didn't really want to spend two night son the bus during the middle of my "vacation".
In the end, I took my documents in to the consulate in Antalya and gave them to the very helpful lady there who really had no clue about visas for Americans. I wasn't able to afford the multiple-entry visa that I normally get because of bank card issues and because of having to pay double to get it expedited, but I happily ended up with a double-entry one-year visa instead. I had to fight for that one as initially she had said that it wasn't possible to do more than a six-month double-entry visa. But thankfully, she called the guy at the embassy in Ankara and let him talk to me and he confirmed that it was indeed possible to have a one-year double-entry visa.
After that it was just a matter of filling out the forms, paying and sending up a prayer that God would protect my documents on the road and get them back to me in good time. As it happened, I turned my documents in on a Friday and that weekend was a Ukrainian holiday, so Monday was a day off, which pushed the processing of my visa to Tuesday, and there was some concern of my visa 9and passport) not making it back in time before I needed to leave early the next Friday. But God worked it all out and they actually got my visa back a day early.
It definitely ended up being a much more "exciting" visa renewal process than I had anticipated (or desired), but God kept reminding me the whole way through that whatever happened He was in control and I just needed to trust Him and His plan. Once I did, I was able to relax and enjoy my vacation.
Getting my visa renewal sorted out started out quite complex and then ended up being really simple. The biggest problem, I think, was that I am an American and they don't often (ever?) have Americans going through Turkey for visa renewals, esp. now that Americans can be in Ukraine for 90 days without a visa at all.
I spent a lot of time on the phone explaining that I live in Ukraine and actually do need a visa because I need to be here for more than 90 days at a time. Then we had issues about where I could renew my visa. There is a Ukrainian consulate in Antalya (where I was vacationing), but they don't do visas there. What they didn't tell me is that they can send the documents to Ankara (the capital of Turkey) and get the visa done at the embassy there. I spent a lot of time talking to the head guy at the Ukrainian embassy in Ankara before we figured out that I did not have to appear in person (enough time that he recognized my voice the next day on the phone), but could send my documents through the consulate in Antalya. It was a relief not to have to go to Ankara as I didn't really want to spend two night son the bus during the middle of my "vacation".
In the end, I took my documents in to the consulate in Antalya and gave them to the very helpful lady there who really had no clue about visas for Americans. I wasn't able to afford the multiple-entry visa that I normally get because of bank card issues and because of having to pay double to get it expedited, but I happily ended up with a double-entry one-year visa instead. I had to fight for that one as initially she had said that it wasn't possible to do more than a six-month double-entry visa. But thankfully, she called the guy at the embassy in Ankara and let him talk to me and he confirmed that it was indeed possible to have a one-year double-entry visa.
After that it was just a matter of filling out the forms, paying and sending up a prayer that God would protect my documents on the road and get them back to me in good time. As it happened, I turned my documents in on a Friday and that weekend was a Ukrainian holiday, so Monday was a day off, which pushed the processing of my visa to Tuesday, and there was some concern of my visa 9and passport) not making it back in time before I needed to leave early the next Friday. But God worked it all out and they actually got my visa back a day early.
It definitely ended up being a much more "exciting" visa renewal process than I had anticipated (or desired), but God kept reminding me the whole way through that whatever happened He was in control and I just needed to trust Him and His plan. Once I did, I was able to relax and enjoy my vacation.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Absences
I feel like I have hardly blogged at all in the last month, which, of course, is not far from the truth. Being away from home does that to one. And now that I have been home for ten days I'm wondering why I haven't done more blogging. I'm chalking it up to the migraines. The blame rests fully there! :) Between my roommate and I we manage to have migraines pretty much every day of the week. It is nice to know that I am not the only one who lives through this, but not really comforting.
Beyond the migraines I am just trying to slip back into life here. I'm cutting back on activities and involvements as much as I can so that I can focus on office work. However, I have cut back on my office time as well, partly because of the migraines and partly because I realized again that living here is a job in itself, besides holding down another full-time job on the side! Hopefully, cutting back on my office hours will actually increase my productivity because I'm having to cut back on all but the most important tasks--which one of the other reasons I haven't blogged as much and probably won't be blogging as much in the future.
I'd definitely appreciate your prayers for both my migraines and my efforts to cut back on some of my activities. It's hard to tie ones hands behind ones back when one wants to do so much! But I think that doing this for a few months will give me a better harvest for my time and energy long-term. I just hope I can stick with it! :)
Beyond the migraines I am just trying to slip back into life here. I'm cutting back on activities and involvements as much as I can so that I can focus on office work. However, I have cut back on my office time as well, partly because of the migraines and partly because I realized again that living here is a job in itself, besides holding down another full-time job on the side! Hopefully, cutting back on my office hours will actually increase my productivity because I'm having to cut back on all but the most important tasks--which one of the other reasons I haven't blogged as much and probably won't be blogging as much in the future.
I'd definitely appreciate your prayers for both my migraines and my efforts to cut back on some of my activities. It's hard to tie ones hands behind ones back when one wants to do so much! But I think that doing this for a few months will give me a better harvest for my time and energy long-term. I just hope I can stick with it! :)
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Turkey
I'm back in Rivne, after five weeks away from home. I am glad to be back, although it was good to have a break too.
My three weeks in Kyiv studying flew by and then it was off to Turkey to take a break and renew my visa. My friend, Saron, planned the trip and worked out all the details with the travel agent, so that all I had to do was show up, which was a huge blessing!
We ended up going to Beldibi, which is a little tourist town not far from Antalya. Our hotel was right on the beach and it was a beautiful relaxing time. I'll explain about the visa situation another day.
We did one little tour of Antalya, which mostly consisted of going to shops, but we did get a boat ride out of it and got to see some of Antalya through the windows of our bus.
I never thought I'd have a vacation like that and it was really beautiful to be able to go and enjoy the Mediterranean. It's been a dream of mine to go there for years. Hopefully, sometime I'll get to go again and see some of the biblical sites too. As it was, I was so tired I was happy to just lay on the beach!
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